Have you ever realized that the one-word question 'why?' always gets you one step closer to authority? The truth is that knowledge is truly power and its lack thereof subjects the mind to slavery unto those who hold the power. This particular post is personalized to ask the question - why? While the intent of taking shots at any individual is not at hand, its purpose is to challenge those involved mentally.
Growing up, it was expected that you respected any one older than you regardless of the quality of judgement the older individual held. To some extent, experience was the royal scepter that was held by elders to control those in a low age bracket. Parents commonly told their children to be good in school, get good grades, be the best at what they do, take the first position by all means, never tell lies, never cheat, seek advise when needed, go the extra mile, make friends with the right folks, never follow the joneses, be yourself. Anyone reading this can identify with at least one that their parents constantly told them. I have no problem with these ideals as they are fantastic values to instill in a child. My question pokes into the thought of whether these ideals stick because the people we call parents, who by the way were taught the same, fail to use them as leaders in their nation. Does this mean that hypocrisy plagues the thoughts of those we call parents? The people we call Presidents, Prime Ministers, Governor are themselves parents to children and know to some extent, the difference between good and evil.
Imagine a father punishes his kid for cheating on a test but meanwhile as Chairman of the Electoral Board, the father assists in rigging an election, robbing people of expressing their rights. A mother who tells her child not to follow the crowd, compromises on the manufacturing quality of her products and services because other people are doing it without consequence and reaping massive rewards. A father who says he expects nothing but the best from his son, builds public infrastructure of poor quality so as to pocket whatever is not used from the assigned public funds. A mother who tells her daughter to go the extra mile at school but cannot do the same for a desperate family in need as a medical doctor. Do these leader-parents ever think about what their children's reactions may be before indulging in certain acts? Do they consider the fact that as leaders, their parenting values should align with their leadership values?
Respectfulness is an important virtue to have in most third world countries but is fixed in a certain way. One has to honor the request of an older individual even though it is of poor judgement and of no personal benefit to the younger individual. If refused, one is tagged a rude child lacking moral upbringing. Why? What is the reasoning behind that? How long do the younger folks have to continue to feed the egos of the elders and leaders? Children, teenagers, youths, challenge the people you call parents. Call them out on their flaws and hypocrisy in a subtle manner. As much as it is very difficult to do, the best way to see a change is to avoid such behaviors if and when you are placed in the same situation, which will be in a few years to come. Keep pushing.
..::GIDI::..
* this post is dedicated to the youth of the Federal Republic of Nigeria.
4 comments:
cool beans. hopefully everybody can start doing this..
...In some sense, I agree it is hypocritical...at different times of our lives we see the world differently and act differently...I think its simply a part of human nature...I agree with the essence of what you are trying to articulate though... Whether or not the trajectory of the human race can be significantly altered remains to be see, I think...
I see often that the values parents are trying to bring up in their kids don't stick because the thought process behind the values is never explained properly asides from the all-mighty "because I say so". This works less so especially if you have a stubborn child like me (and you I'm presuming) who needs a more rational answer. That's why so many kids end up picking values from their own experiences or friends because it's more concrete to them.. This can be a problem for those whose friends do not align with their parents values, then parents say "that's not how I raised you".
Respect is predicated as you say on some strange hierarchy of age meanwhile sometimes age means nothing. Imagine a Nigerian parent trying to argue with us about social media? I was talking to someone about McKinsey and they scoffed at the idea of consulting just because they had never heard of it. In my personal life my father often tends to be staunchly rigid in his thoughts that are often wrong. He does no research and his thoughts are backed up on nothing but his convictions, yet if you dare challenge him you are rude etc which I've learned to respectfully ignore.
I think that's what the American education system has over us is that it critical inquiry is encouraged. Yes, you don't have a PhD like the person who wrote the article but so what? You can still have an opinion and get your questions answered. Americans are thought to question things and engage in their moral underpinnings on a much more substantive level (Granted, in college I am only exposed to a small, somewhat privileged subset of the American population).
I've been lucky that my values and choices are generally ones my parents are proud of but I believe this is in spite of the "words of advice" not necessarily because of it. Other factors like going to a good school, having motivated friends etc have contributed much more to my persona.
I guess for me, your post is interesting but not anything i haven't thought of before. It could be even more insightful if it gave suggestions/approaches to tackle the hypocrisy and flaws? For most young Nigerians the line between calling them out and keeping the codes of respect Nigerian parents believe in is a tenuous one to balance so your suggestions might be constructive to hear?
Obviously this outlet is to write about whatever you feel like but I wonder if an interesting follow up post would be for people who do ask why but do nothing about it. Those (and I'm guilty) who ask those important why questions but don't do anything with the answer. There is a substantial amount of people i have dinner conversations with who ask why questions but we aren't calling our senators, writing editorials or taking actions and so our questioning might be just as good as being quiet.
There's a quote about us living in "an armchair blogging world which has created a generation of critics and not leaders".
just a thought. No pressure.
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